Audition - chicago2

Auditioning for Ballet Intensives is grueling, stressful, emotional and more than anything completeley draining.

Worst of all is waiting for the results.  The email comes…..the email is opened.

Tears of joy, tears of elation, tears of disappointment.

A LOT of tears.

And then hours and hours of self doubt.

What could I have done differently?  What could I have done better?  What should I do next time ~ for the next audition?

Should I have signed her up for a different city?  Should we have flown to a different audition?  Should I have bought her a new leotard?  How should I change my pre-audition pep-talk.? Or my post audition advice?  Should I talk more? Should I shut up?

HOW can I help?

As a Mom, I am supposed to be strong and have the “perfect” advice.  Guess what?

I failed!

For all of you aspiring dancers, please understand that auditions affect us too.  As a parent of an aspiring dancer ~ counting on the summer intensives to help create her ballet “resume” and pave her way into the world of professional ballet; auditions are wrought with anxiety.

OUR anxiety

Sure, we understand that you are feeling stress ~ BIG TIME.~ much more than we will ever understand.  Please know we are feeling stress too.

Please understand that we too cry ourselves to sleep when we see your dreams dashed.  Please know that just like you, we  scream into our pillows when we read the “polite” but cold -hearted rejection saying ~ “best of luck in your future endeavors”.

No one puts MY baby in a corner.

Isn’t there someone I can call?  Isn’t there a way to have a do-over?  Certainly there must be a mistake….could the audition numbers be mixed up?  Can we go to another city to try again?

The worst part of this whole experience is that no one taught me how to handle my children’s disappointments.  I know how to handle my own pain, my own emotional wounds ~ I am REALLY good at turning lemons into lemonade.  But no one taught me how to handle the emotional wounds of my children.  Physical wounds are easy; bandaids, gauze, hospitals even ~ but emotional, that is different.

I have officially realized that if there were grades given out for handling my children’s emotional setbbacks – I would receive no greater than a D+.  Perhaps this is because I am a problem solver ~ not a nuturer.  I am always looking for a solution (hence the podcast) to a problem.

Problem is ~ I can’t solve this problem.  I can’t fix her pain.

What I can do is feel more prepared for the future.  If my child is going to pursue a career in the world of professional ballet, I need to be prepared.  To do this I may take on meditation (NO not medication)…..perhaps more yoga……more prayers and then I plan on pretending to trust that  no matter the result, my daughter will come out on the other side a better person, a stronger dancer and wind up where she is meant to be.

Me on the other hand?

I am actively writing “The Stress-Free Audition Guide for Parents”

~ Feel free to send me YOUR personal stories! ~